Romantic Woes – Goshen, Utah

Abandoned-Mines

Ah, what could represent our hearts better than a scenic picture of an abandoned silver mine? If you answered “nothing”, you’re correct.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the idea of “falling” in love and how it gets harder the older I get. I remember back in high school, it was spontaneous, crazy, intense, and rich with feeling.

I told her how much I needed her. She told me how much she needed me. Nicknames. Cooing. The hand holding. Ugh. Makes me want to puke. But, I miss the days when feelings and affection flowed freely between two individuals.

Now, I’m much more… risk adverse. Love has become a lot less spontaneous and a lot more calculated.

Will our socioeconomic backgrounds harmonize?

How do our political and educational backgrounds mesh?

What are her spending habits like?

Do I like the way she uses her fork to eat?

It is now much more difficult than determining whether the girl I liked was “hot.”

But why does that happen? And in the process of trying to take control in our romantic lives, do we actually lose our ability to feel joy and affection?

For me personally, I employ certain tactics or strategies in dating to try and produce a certain outcome. But, I’ve realized that perhaps those tactics and strategies give me an excuse out, something to blame other than my own shortcomings.

What about you? Have you noticed a similar trend in your own life or the lives of those around you?

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Wandering – White Sands National Monument

White-Sands-National-Monument

Living on my own means that every day is exciting because every day I discover something new about myself. Last week for example, I found out that I’m still scared of the dark when I’m all alone in a very large house.

A few days ago, on my monthly trip to the grocery store (I have an abnormal fear of buying groceries), I realized something about my lifestyle. I simply cannot buy anything that will expire within 3 weeks because I either won’t eat it before then or I won’t have finished all of it before then. I realized this at the ripe age of 26.

I remember being a little kid in elementary school thinking that middle schoolers had it made. Only to get to middle school to think that high school was where it was at. After getting to high school and still not having a clue of what I was doing, I looked to college students. Now that I’m in college looking towards graduation and adulting, I realized that there really isn’t a rush.

So many of us feel so rushed to have all the pieces of our lives together right now or last year. We miss the joy and fun that comes from the process of discovering and making mistakes along the way.

Truly embarking on a self-discovery process through time and through different paths means that when we really find something that we’re passionate about, we commit to it 100%.

My college career path has led me to become a financial/budget/policy analyst or project manager. But now I realized that I have passions that I’m really passionate about. What if I wanted to be a National Geographic photographer, comedian, or world traveler vagabond?

What about you? Do you have a passion or pursuit that you wouldn’t mind working 10-14 hours a day for? What was your process for discovering what you loved to do?

Perspective – Santa Fe, New Mexico

Sunset Insta2-1
Sunset – Canon 6D + 16-35 mm ISO 3200 | f/9.5 | 1/125 | 16 mm

Ah, what better way to think about all the mistakes you’ve made in life than sitting back and looking at the sunset (Megan Cook says that she told me that, but don’t trust her).

In all seriousness, New Mexico is the bomb. When most people think of New Mexico, all they think of is desert, heat, and rocks. Well, that’s not too far from truth.

However, there are little gems here and there. But you have to search for them, like all the rest of life’s treasures.

Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about the decisions that we make in life. For each positive or negative decision that we make, we can affect our lives significantly. What if the next “no” you say to yourself sets you back 3 months or 3 years?

And sometimes, I have so many decisions to make that all I want to do is eat some pizza and cry to myself in a corner somewhere.

I’ve heard of this thing called “star therapy.” It has little to do with drugs and dancing. Sometimes when life seems to get too… large to handle, looking at the stars puts everything back into perspective.

You should try it sometime.

If you do, let me know how it goes.